I always had a questions on how to be successful, but when we look at movies, books, etc, they always talk about the successful ones. In order to be successful, we shouldn’t just act like successful people, but we also have to avoid actions that lead to failure. In order to do that, we have to look at failures and analyse them. This movie depicted well, of how ones action and way of thinking can lead to failure.
In the movie ‘Uncut gems’, the Main character Howard gets chased by debt collectors all the time. Sometimes he gets bashed, sometimes he just goes through an argument. The whole story is about him trying to make his way out of these guys, and get rich and the same time by going for one big shot, which is sport betting, or selling un-evaluated gem.
I mentioned a lot of times that creating an environment is the most important factor in anything. In order to succeed, you need to keep going, and in order to maintain persistence, you need environment. But there are actions that works opposite, which can create enemies that will push you off the edge. Most of the time, those actions are words that come out of our mouth. I’ll describe what I noticed and felt throughout the movie.
First one is the habitual promises. Howard, the main character makes a lot of promises. If you make too much promises that you don’t think you’ll end up doing, you won’t last long. ‘Trust me, I’ll pay it back in 2 days’, ‘I’ll be back soon’, ‘We will be rich soon’ and etc. The reason why these promises are dangerous is pretty straight forward, because there’s no guarantee. When we make promises, we have to know exactly what we are giving and receiving. If you don’t think you will be able to pay it back in 2 days, you don’t burrow it.
Telling people about what I’m doing/going to do
Howard thinks his gem worth’s a million bucks, he gets excited and tells everyone and his family about it. Apparently, its worth around a tenth of that. Telling people about what you going to do before you do it, is never a good idea because you don’t know what the results are going to be. There are self development books that says ‘tell everyone about what your doing to create environment’ but I personally think that its never a good idea. What if you don’t end up doing it? what if you fail? there’s always a higher chance of you failing if its your first time doing it. If you tell everyone and fail, your more likely to quit. Like Howard, telling people about selling his gem and becoming a millionaire before selling it, will lead to results accordingly.
Promises and telling people about what I’m doing are actions. So what are the thoughts that lead to these actions? Howard actually makes enough income to pay off debts by selling jewelries and gems, but he doesn’t pay the money back. Instead, he goes into sports betting with those money. Why is he doing that? is it because he’s a gamble addict? Its because of expectations. When people have high expectations, they start taking risks.
Curiosity is followed by ambition, ambition is followed by madness.
Thankfully, we can control these expectations through discipline or emotional control. Because we are humans, we can’t completely get rid of emotions from us, they are only controllable. Emotions are triggered by external factors, then emotions sway our decisions. When we see big numbers or potentials of high income, emotions kick in. When emotions are high, our sight narrows and even low probabilities start to look certain. We lose track of risks, or sometimes, we know there are risks, but still go ahead. Disciplines give you the ability to step back from here. The moment we step back, we start to see everything clear again, this is why discipline, or emotional control is important in decision making, which leads you to better actions and better life.